With Great Change Comes Great Responsibility

So, i changed. I agree with my last post. However, change has never called for much action on my part in the past. After a couple breakdowns, and long hours laying in bed thinking, ive realized i have to take some action.

Some of the change ive gone through this year isnt good. When people say, "Highschool changes you." They arent exaggerating. Going from a private school with a graduating class of 10 girls total, to a school with over a thousand people, you slowly morph into the mix. Your morals are bent, and you dont realize they are until you step back and look at everything. This is the spot im in.

The people i have met this year have changed me. More, the experiences ive had with them. Ive come to the conclusion that trust is misplaced around every corner in the real world. Occasionally, however, you find people like Jessica Tarin, David Robinson, and Alex Moore, who know the real meaning of friendship, trust, and loyalty. But, in the opposing view, your trust needs to be carefully guarded. You need not chase he relationship cloud. Let it come to you. at the beginning of this year i made the mistake of lusting after a relationship. I dug myself in deep. I jumped at the thought that someone was interested in me, therefore, i didnt think about what i was doing. I got involved too fast, and didnt think. the domino effect brought me here. having to completely recenter, find myself, remember the purpose God has for me. Unfortunately, its easier said than done.
Im a mess i guess.
Clinging to the remnants of perfection like most do after they break it.
Its what Ive asked for its what Ive needed.
I know that there were better days,
but to see the light and to feel the rays.
Life was always back and forth
...and we were idling or making useless progress.
Waiting for the rain to stop.
Destination: beautiful.
Someday will come back to us, if you're willing, let it go.
But some say we're headed for destruction

I have to get my world put together. Its funny, when i have alot on my mind, i clean. My room has been spotless for the past three months... i think its time to let go.