On Letting Go... "About a year ago, I was talking to an artist friend of mine about inspiration, and where it comes from. Throughout most of my life, I have never been able to answer that question, but I can easily answer that, now. And it was because of something a young girl (maybe 11 or 12 years old) said to me at my first gallery exhibit..."It's like you are in love with being in love". During the first couple of years of my life as a photographer, I could not have told you exactly what it is that inspires me...but that little girl instantly shed light on the truth behind my work...and I have never forgotten her words. There is no substitution for the pure honesty of a child. As time went by, I could not help but ponder the truth of her statement. "Love" is such a broad-reaching & nebulous term, so I began to look very closely at "what is love", to me. And I soon became very aware of what facets of love inspire me... I've been a very fortunate man, in that the 3 relationships I've had over the last 5 years were with women I simply had to photograph every day. We created art. Together. Truth-be-told, the majority of my work you see here on DA was produced with the 3 aforementioned women. The layer of reality & intimacy in the photos we created was undeniable. You simply cannot fake that...and it was exactly this that I fell in love with. This was my introduction to photography. I quickly became addicted to having a muse. To photograph someone I love...and someone that loves me. It is a powerfully-addicting drug, believe me. I've never been the same, since. What I call "art" comes from a very deep place inside of me...and to share that with someone means letting them into that place, with no restrictions. The bond between the two of us is infinitely deeper, as a result. But as I've said before: such great joy is often paid for with a parallel sorrow. Everything changes, eventually. Nothing lasts forever. And after that train has wrecked into a crumpled mess on the tracks, it's time to pay the price. For me, it is absolutely eviscerating to lose that fountain of inspiration. I think because she and I have been to such a deep & profound place together, it takes much, much longer to climb back to the surface...and it doesn't help, knowing that the climb up has to be done alone. Yet, despite the soul-numbing pain with which I pay for the joy I knew, and the art we would create together, I have never regretted climbing aboard that disaster-bound train. Eventually, and always, I get back in-line for more. It is purely for cathartic reasons that I write all of this. Only just today, after a year of healing, I can finally let go of her. To let go of the sad things, and the bad things, and the painful memories. I can focus solely on my good memories of her...and to smile again. It's much better this way. Thank you for reading my little cathartic diatribe, here...I love you guys"
--Unknown
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