A Love That Matters

There comes a time when you really realize how unworthy you are of certain people in your life. this is the saturday of show weekend for Guys and Dolls, and i am really feeling how much i am going to miss this cast. This year has been especially hard because Miss Adelaide is a comedic role, it's junior year which means work galore, I'm dealing with my eating disorder, and I'm working with some people that i don't necessarily get along with all the time, but i want to love them anyways. its been trying and testing, but i feel as though I'm getting through. honestly though, the reason i chose to write to you, is because I'm recognizing that i absolutely could not have gotten through the past three months without the support of certain people in my life who were on my side from the very beginning. God put people around every corner to care for me and relax me. so, this post is dedicated to you, Brigitta, Peter, Kalen, Jacob, and Mrs. Lamb. I'm realizing that a vital part of love is that one must humble themselves and accept the help of others. it is then that they realize how much they don't deserve the love of others sometimes. These people in my life have given me love so freely and never expected anything in return. i feel compelled to do something, give something to all of them to thank them, but even then i feel it won't equate. these people delight in me...they take joy in watching me do what i love, and pain when i am hard on myself and feel like i will crash and burn. no words can describe how thankful i am to the Lord for placing them in my life right now. even if some of them are only for a time... I'm grateful to have had them at all. thanks to them, i had the courage to return home: to myself, to God, to the stage, and the beginnings of peace.

Love means humbling oneself and realizing how truly blessed they are to have those in their life that love them, even when they do not deserve to be loved at all.

This is the Love that matters--the Love the Lord gives freely every day.